Another Celebration

Thursday through Sunday are holidays for Islam. This is the end of the Hajj, when Muslim pilgrims journey to Mecca and Medina (and I need to check my spelling) to walk the path of Mohammad. Thursday is a day of fasting, for those who choose, to commemorate the frantic running of Hagar to find food for her and her son Ishmael after Abraham had turned her out. The story is that Hagar ran between two mountains, Marwah and Safa, trying to find food and water for her and Ishmael, and then on her seventh trip, she saw a spring of water appear where Ishmael sat and waited for her.

After the day of fasting comes Eid, which is a day of celebration. I got the idea, as Esman described it to me, that they celebrate this Eid as we do Easter. The people wear new clothes to prayers, and many more people than usual fill the mosques, and after prayers, families feast together and go to friends’ houses to share in their feasts. Additionally, this is a good time for children: they usually receive gifts, either of new clothing, or in wealthier families, money. When families visit each other during Eid, guests will bring money for the children in the house, and occasionally, the host family will give money to the visiting children.

As an aside, Muslims celebrate another Eid, which comes after Ramadan, which was this year in late July and August. During that 30-day period, Muslims forego food, water, cigarettes, and sexual encounters during the daylight hours, and break their daily fasts only at sunset. In the summer, these can be long days! The Eid that will be celebrated this week, though, is a celebration of renewal of faith.

Esman explained that a lamb (sheep) will be sacrificed, and that the meat is divided by families into thirds: one-third goes to the family for their meal; one-third goes to poor families who might not have enough money to purchase a lamb or to slaughter it; and one-third is offered to guests who will come to visit during the holiday. At the sacrifice, the people give thanks that they are able to sacrifice a lamb instead of sacrificing their children, as, according to the story, Abraham was asked by God to do. Of course, this idea of sacrifice disturbs me; just like I didn’t want to know about the Gurkas’ goat, I certainly don’t want to know about a lamb, which, as we all know because of Mary, is a cute little animal.

I also learned that this Eid is part of a marriage ritual here. Grooms-to-be are expected to bring gifts to their fiancée’s family, and to their fiancée. The gifts to the girl should be the new clothing to wear to prayers, as well as make-up, jewelry, and food, and the gifts to her family should be money – and lots of it. The bride-to-be’s family will spend some of the money buying a gift for the young man, but most of the money will be kept by the family or spent by the young woman’s parents.

This ritual is becoming difficult for many young men, who, without education or a good job, cannot fulfill their fiancée’s family’s expectations for gifts, and therefore postpone the marriage, sometimes for years. In fact, in the past, some of the uneducated and under-employed young men would go to Iran to work for years, saving enough money to provide not only appropriate gifts at Eid, but also appropriate gifts and food for the wedding. With the recent downturn in Iran’s economy, so that Iranian money is now almost useless (sanctions from somewhere we know well at work!) and the number of available jobs is tanking, young Afghan men cannot go there as before to find work that will pay for the expected loot. Esman says that this overwhelming tradition is becoming a topic at Friday prayers, so that the country will look at what the focus on funds is doing to its young people. After all, the thought goes, which is more important? Appropriate and large gifts? Or marriage and a family life?

A fascinating thing I learned about Hajj is that every Muslim should endeavor to make this trip during his or her lifetime, although someone who cannot afford the trip will be excused. Also, pilgrims wear white robes, and men shave their heads, so that all will look the same, as God sees no difference in his children. Women, however, cover their heads with a white scarf. On the 10th day of the lunar calendar, which is Friday this year, the pilgrims sacrifice a lamb as do those who have remained at home. Because they can't use the meat, the pilgrims donate it to the Saudi government, which distributes it to the poor. As I was reading about it, I found travel agents who deal exclusively with the pilgrimage, and most interesting, one of the ten most beautiful airports in the world, according to Time Magazine, is an airport open ONLY during Hajj in Saudi Arabia. I cannot fathom the number of people who must make this trek every year.

I continue to learn a great deal about a country and a religion about which I have known nothing. I am so fortunate to share office space with young men who welcome me and who do not mind discussing their religion with me and explaining it to me, and who accept that my religion is different from theirs, although we share many beliefs. I often have them fact-check my writing to make sure that I have either quoted them correctly or have re-told the stories correctly, and they are very helpful – and don’t complain!

I know they will have much to tell after this weekend, and I will be sure to let you know what that is!